I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I wish you could order shots online.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The adults are the big ones right?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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