I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
