I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
