What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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