I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize