Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
