it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
