I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
