you thought your balls were fighting each other...
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
