Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize