Define "chronic" masturbator.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize