Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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