drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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