D3 body, D1 cock
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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