I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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