the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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