that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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