In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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