I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
