you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
