Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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