... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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