Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
