Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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