Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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