Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
