Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
