Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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