I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
