I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
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