I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
