That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
