direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
