i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Randomize