You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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