im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize