I just made out with a guy for $7.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
