She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
