I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
