I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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