yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
