i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
