South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
