She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
