and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
