I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
