Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
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Do I have a choice?
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HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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