You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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