Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
