fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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