look no pants
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
